Chasing rainbows

[Ian Yi]

Just thinking that if you weren't pretty...

[Val Conroy]

...
Well you

What does that even have to do with my looks?! I can't read your mind, I don't know what a dumb vampire smilie means!
What are you, a vampire? You vanna suck my blaaad or something??

[Ian Yi]

Of course.

[Val Conroy]

You're a vampire.

*so not buying it*

[Ian Yi]

Yes.

[Val Conroy]

Really

How did you become a vampire? Are you like 800 years old?

[Ian Yi]

Exchanging blood. And good guess. You're just shy by a couple of years.

[Val Conroy]

Oh yeah? That's really a thing huh? Did it hurt?

Also if you're older than 600 you might be a liiiittle too old for me.
I'm ageist like that, I only go for +/- 100

[Ian Yi]

Not really, no.

Also wouldn't that make you at least 500 yourself?

[Val Conroy]

Did it feel goooood? The movies always make it seem like it's super pleasurable but I mean. Some dude biting you in the neck? Ow.

And no, the range is -89 to 121.

(Super shitty math skills there)

[Ian Yi]

It's different with a vampire. Their teeth are different.

-89?

[Val Conroy]

Magic teeth like needles?

I just creeped myself out.

And yeah. 100-21?

[Ian Yi]

There's a chemical process involved as well. Plus charm...

Your numbers are highly unreliable.

[Val Conroy]

You are SO committed to this...

Also... no. 100-21 is...

(Long moment passes)

Shut up

[Ian Yi]

I read a lot of books, silly child.