Jerky snatcher

[Stefjan Auer]

Oh
Oh no, sweet summer child
Innocent Wesley

Justin thought me and YOU were sleeping together

I was sleeping with Justin, fuck yeah! But he went PSYCHO on me like a month in and started checking up on me
He even broke into my phone!

[Wesley Carter]

OH.

Well, I guess the SMOOCH SMOOCH texts and calling each other gay ass pet names didn't help.

[Stefjan Auer]

Hahaha! Yeah he didn't believe me when I told him we were just joking around! That guy had ISSUES man.

Man I wish he hadn't gone nuts. He was almost perfect... And he gave amazing head, holy shit that guy could suck dick

...it's always the crazies that are great in bed... smh

[Wesley Carter]

Hey, not always! Maybe in your world, though.
I always thought girls were dramatic but they're nothing against catty gay men.

[Stefjan Auer]

Huh your track record hasn't been AMAZING either brother.

But it's true... the super gay ones are the ones you gotta look out for man.

[Wesley Carter]

Shana doesn't count. She was a summer camp girl.

[Stefjan Auer]

And what about Alana? HMM? Crazy bitch tried to cut you off from ALL your friends!

[Wesley Carter]

Uh yeah....
Did you hear about her pushing some guy to suicide because of that? All he had was her and she was toxic af.

[Stefjan Auer]

Dude WHAT
What the FUCK some guy killed himself?!!? When??

[Wesley Carter]

That guy she started dating after I kicked her to the curb! They were together forever and she like... systematically pushed everyone out of his life until it was just her and he couldn't take it or something. It was so fucked up. You don't remember? They had grief counselors and everything.

[Stefjan Auer]

NO I would've remembered if some guy killed himself!

...
wait

WAIT
HOLD ON
Was it that guy in 1st year? The one uh. He was like a science geek or something? President of something chemistry club?

[Wesley Carter]

Yes! How are you just now remembering this? It was such a big deal when it happened.

[Stefjan Auer]

Bro, that was the year my brother went to
went overseas for his army thing

I was a LITTLE distracted okay!!!

[Wesley Carter]

THE WHOLE YEAR, though?
Well you were kinda blazed most of that year.

[Stefjan Auer]

Oh yeah that was the year I discovered weed wasn't it? Haha! Well there you go, that explains everything.

Also
hehehee
Your dad
is dating your girl's
mom
LOOOOOOL Dude
I can't even right now