We Are Bulletproof

Greenwood? Oh no, no—Alva didn't live in Greenwood apartments. That was nowhere near where he lived, or where Rae lived. He struggled to come to terms with Greenwood as lucidity began to filter on through the layers of clumsy thoughts. Something wasn't quite right. Something was... missing. Gone. In his mind, there was a sort of blank spot.

He put a hand to his head as he slid sideways again, but thankfully the man who took him in held him upright. Alva looked down at him. He wasn't a familiar face but it was nevertheless a nice face. A concerned face and a kind face, though there wasn't a smile on his lips. It was in the eyes, really. Alva felt instinctively that he could trust this man.

"My name is... Alva. Ren. I live... oh my head..." He let his head fall into his hand momentarily. That aching dark spot just behind his ear... the hollowness where another consciousness resided... There used to be something there. Alva frowned down at the man's concerned face. "I... I live... in the suburbs. House. My house... I..." He tried hard to recall his address but nothing came to him. It was too hard to grasp onto the fine details. The street, the house number... He only knew that he lived in the suburbs.

"I'm sorry, I can't... remember."

"Apartment?" He vaguely heard that over the noise of the storm. Why was Rae asking about an apartment? Alva lived in the suburbs with his parents, not in an apartment. It was too difficult to find one that could reasonably accommodate his needs, as most were built quite a long time ago and weren't designed with handicapped people in mind.

Maybe Rae meant that they were going to his apartment. That sounded more plausible even to Alva's scrambled mind. He nodded to give consent. He'd visited Rae before of course, and Rae had helped him into his building and up to his floor. Luckily he didn't live up too high; otherwise it would have been a nightmare getting up and down, especially when the lone elevator broke. Rae didn't live in the nice part of town, where rent was expensive, but that was okay. Alva wasn't with him for the money, after all. 

But in his current state he didn't realize—he wasn't in his chair. He was moving with Rae, letting him support him but for the most part Alva was walking along. At one point he began to slip and let out a softly surprised cry, except Rae grabbed him again and pulled him back in close. Alva sighed. He should've known that Rae would never let him fall.

Inside and with the door closed, it was much quieter. Alva could see better, too... And he saw that it wasn't Rae holding him up. He muttered a swift apology, groggily pushing away. The stranger didn't let him go far, instead lowering him onto the bottom steps of a long staircase leading up.

"I'm sorry... I thought you were... Rae," he murmured as he grabbed onto a section of railing beside him to keep himself upright. 'I... I want to go home..."

Alva felt a pair of hands steadying him and instinctively reached out. His fumbling fingertips encountered a wrist, a forearm, and he latched on tight. Deliriously he looked up; the wind blew all around them like an angry siren, so loud that he could barely hear himself think. "Rae?" He couldn't see who held on to him so his mind defaulted to the first person it knew. The first person it wanted to be here with him in the middle of a storm.

"Hey! Hey you okay?"

He smiled weakly and let himself fall against Rae, relieved in the knowledge that he was safe now in the arms of someone he knew. Rae would take care of him. Rae wouldn't let him go anywhere. Alva nodded as Rae asked again if he was okay. He felt hands on him, lifting up the lapels of his jacket to check him over, to make sure that he wasn't injured. There were no wounds on Alva; the injuries were on someone else. His clothes were stained with blood but the rain lashing down on him had washed most of it away.

Now all there was left was a pinkish stain.

Click

The door latched behind him as he eased his chair out of the doorway and out into the hall outside. Susumu didn't follow him, but Alva was too despondent to really notice. Vaguely he heard voices from inside, muffled by the closed door, and assumed that the two men left in the room were discussing something private--something that Alva wasn't privy to.

It didn't matter anyway, what they discussed. Alva supposed that Susumu was trying to get more information on his behalf, since Yang wasn't forthcoming with what he knew. All he could say, repeatedly, was that the mark wasn't coming off. No one could help him; only the Ancient who cursed him could un-curse him.

Alva's head dipped low. He brushed the heel of his palm across his eyes, where a wet, warm heat was gathering. Slowly, he bent forward with his face in his hands and gave vent to silent tears. Alva had never felt so much despair, so much grief. He gulped, then let out a ragged gasp of air as a sob tore itself from his throat. Muffling the noise into his hands, his fingers curled inward until the nails scraped against his forehead and temples.

It was so... hopeless. No matter what he did and where he turned, there was always a dead end. There was always something beyond his ability to fix, an obstacle too difficult to scale or a wall too high to climb. Normally Alva, who was cheerful and bright and optimistic, tried to find the silver lining in the storm clouds but this time there was no silver lining. There was no hope.

These were powers beyond even his comprehension and he didn't know how any of them--even Susumu, powerful though he was--could overcome this. Could they fight the Ancients? Persuade them to change their minds? They couldn't even find one! There were so many more questions than answers that riddled his thoughts that he didn't even know where to begin looking for a solution.

After a moment, he lifted his head. Brushed the tears away, because crying when things looked helpless wasn't in Alva. Even with hopelessness settling like a boulder on his chest, he didn't want to whimper. He didn't want anyone to see him being this weak because while his life seemed apparently over... others still had to live. Those around him, the ones he loved, had to carry on and he didn't want to be a burden on them any longer. Ryland, Yoojin, Susumu, all of them had spent weeks trying to help him, putting their own lives on hold.

He brought out his phone and with a heavy heart contacted his cousin Ryland. The only thing that Alva could do now was to keep him safe--keep them all safe. That meant pushing people out of his life that he loved more dearly than himself, cutting them off and keeping them at arms' length so that what happened to him wouldn't happen to them. Alva didn't know why he had been chosen for this curse but he knew that he could never let anyone else go through what he was going through.

The air grew cold around him suddenly. Alva's phone fell from his nerveless fingers as the elevator doors swung open, all the way at the end of the hallway, and a singular figure stepped out. The breath froze in his lungs as their eyes met across the distance separating them and Alva's heart clenched in his chest. The figure raised a hand and completely against his will, Alva stood. The legs that refused to work for him gained strength; the severed nerves in his spine fired as he stepped forward on his own.

"S-Susu!"

Without being told, he knew who the man was at the end of the hall. He knew what the man wanted him to do. Shock evolved into a full-blown panic as Alva's body moved of its own accord, stepping slowly forward. The only part of his body that he had control over was his head, which he turned frantically to the left and right, dumbly trying to express his dread. No... no he didn't want to do this. He couldn't.

Suddenly the door behind him opened. Alva turned his terrified eyes onto Yang, pale-faced as he stood in the doorway. Yang bowed deeply to the man at the end of the hall. "Susu!" Alva cried out again, hearing the panic inside infusing his rising voice. Distraught with fear, Alva could do nothing but continue to move forward, even as his shrill voice filled the once-silent hallway.

"Susu help! Help me! Don't let him take me Susu! Please! Hel--"

With a flick of the wrist, the man silenced him. Alva's eyes dulled; his mouth grew slack. The world turned black. He walked the length of the hallway and came to a stop behind the man. The master. Together they walked into the elevator, whose doors closed on their own without a single button press.

Nobody else will lose you
this way

I'm so sorry Ry
I have t—

(Text unfinished)

I can't risk it

If you're far away, then maybe I won't get to you if
I have another blackout

If you're not beside me, I can't hurt you

I can't hurt you Ry. I can't lose another brother like I did
...
I can't

I know Ry. We've been brothers our whole lives.

So you know I wouldn't be saying this if I had any other choice

But
I've been
Remember that first time I had my blackout? And I was covered in blood?
And
I didn't even know whose blood that was?

...
I can't let that be your blood
Or Yoojin's
Or Susu's or Rae's

Please Ry

Please

It's... too late, Ry

Can't you see? I'm already
cursed

This mark isn't going away unless the one who put it there takes it off

I'm not
dying

Just
I can't be with you guys and live a normal life anymore

Don't think of it as giving up, Ry

Think of it as
As letting me protect you

Letting me keep the people I love safe

If you love me
You'll let me do this alone

I couldn't live with myself if any of you got dragged into this, Ry
Please

Ry
Please

Don't make this harder than it already is

I love you
I don't want you to get hurt from this

This is beyond all of us, Ry

We can't get over this by being plucky and hoping for the best

Sometimes you just have to know
when to give up

No Ry

What if the ancient tries to use you or Yoojin? I can't let that happen to you guys.

I need you to
Stop helping me

You need to keep your distance, all of you

Yeah
Maybe

But I don't want you guys to keep
Doing this

You shouldn't be taking on my problems

I'm sorry
I pulled you into this mess

All of you. Yoojin and Susu too...