You just want attention

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

I appreciate beauty in whatever form it comes in. Even if it's my own ass.

Gross
On both accounts
Hector's a total poser. He's not even old money rich, she can't possibly see anything in him!
Keep him away from her

[Edel Ziegler]

see? ANNOYING

you don't see me calling your girlfriend's tits gross
and Hector might be those things but Jen's vulnerable and he's HERE


where are you?
or do you want me to go to the general location of this area code and weed you out that way?

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

You only call me annoying because you know it's true
ANYWAY my ass is better looking than Rey's

She paid 15,000 for those breasts, they'd better not be gross

Weed me out
If you can!

[Edel Ziegler]

right, I've seen it and I'm with Rey, not you sooooooooo
also when have YOU seen Rey's ass?
he didn't go to school with us so you don't get the locker room excuse

you're really going to make me?
not just annoying, cruel too

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

So that says nothing, just that you're with the guy with the second-best ass
And relax, I saw it by accident during that winter trip to Switzerland

Insulting me isn't making me want to give you the address~

[Edel Ziegler]

whatever, best GAY ass
you can keep putting him down but I still love him

and okay... weird that he never told me

what do you want me to do, literally kiss your newly befreckled ass?

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

He didn't tell you? Really?
Jen tells me about every dick she sees. In excruciating detail.

And you'd like that, sicko.
IF I tell you where I am, you are not to tell anyone else

Not Jen, or Rey, or Jaime, or ANYONE

[Edel Ziegler]

Rey isn't Jen

You didn't even tell Jaime?

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

Rey was probably just embarrassed, don't think too much about it

And I just told him I was in the States, not my address
I'm at the lake house in that tiny town near Portland
You know the one, we vacationed here when we were like 17?

It's the only one they couldn't get their hands on because it's under my mother's name

[Edel Ziegler]

Oh yeah
That one.

Where I kissed you when I was drunk.
Yikes

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

That wasn't even the only place you kissed me while you were drunk, you weirdo

But I do remember that
You kissed me and then you just
Fucking threw up all over the bed

And I had to sleep sitting up with your head in my lap
Crushing my balls

Worst birthday ever

[Edel Ziegler]

Alcohol and teenage hormones don't mix well, what can I say

And that is such a heartwarming way to put it 😬

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

Well now you have a boyfriend you can throw up on on his birthday

And you brought it up, not me!
You better not do that again
My balls can't handle another night like that

[Edel Ziegler]

I hold my liquor much better now thank youuu

Can't handle what?
The crushing or the blueness 😆

[Cristoval de Azcarate]

Excuse me? I don't have blue balls. 
Those are not a thing.

I have plenty of hot neighbors to fuck if I want to!