fancy running you over

[Zhou Luli]

Bohai always loved sitting by the windows because it gave him something to talk about with Tyson. He could spend hours in a nice little cafe if they were by the window, where conversation turned organically from events in their lives to the things they observed outside the windows. Plus, he loved birds and he liked to watch them if there were trees close by. When he was a kid, he used to feed them, too, until he learned that was bad for the birds.

Luli sat down with a "Thank you," after Tyson politely pulled a chair out for her. Should she say any of what she just learned from Bohai? He was still with them, invisible to the one that mattered, but he had a lot to say to Luli, about window seats, about birds, about how he wished that she would just please let him borrow her body.

"Really? Anything I want?" Her eyes were like stars then. She knew just what she wanted to order; she wasn't kidding when she said it took a lot of food to get her energy back. Hopefully he wouldn't regret buying her the food but some part of her thought she should just take him up on it. After all, he did want her to channel his lover again, and she couldn't do it very long if she tried to be polite and eat like a prim girl.

When she looked up, she saw that Tyson was looking at the chair beside him. Was he aware that Bohai was there? Could he feel him? Maybe he had a little bit of the psychic ability in him, then! But he wasn't looking right at him, not the way Bohai was, who was watching Tyson like he had a lot to say to him. Luli felt the guilt eating at her again, even though she had every right to eject him from her body.

"He must care about you a lot," she said carefully. "To stick around this stubbornly."

[Tyson Liu]

Bohai loved windows and he loved window seats, which meant that Tyson was forced to love the seat next to the window seat, both in cafes and on airplanes, on trains, on buses—any mode of transportation that had a window seat was off limits to him. He didn't mind much because he usually slept if they were traveling somewhere, and in cafes he liked to sit and listen. Tyson was a great listener, but a terrible conversationalist.

So he left the seat beside him free, the one right beside the rain-soaked window. It was really coming down out there; he could barely make out the shapes of cars and other buildings. People were running to get out of the deluge but luckily they had escaped it just in time. He nodded and managed a slight smile at Luli's enthusiasm—or disbelief—at his offer. "Yes. Whatever you want." Money was no object to Tyson, not anymore. Not when Bohai wasn't here to enjoy what money could offer them—trips abroad, good food and wine, creature comforts.

As he waved a waitress over to take Luli's order, he looked at the seat next to him again. Bohai had to be there. He wouldn't sit beside Luli, after all, not when Tyson was here. That knowledge was a small grain of comfort, at least. "He loves me." His reply was simple but that didn't take away from the truth of it. Bohai promised to be with him forever... but neither of them knew how brief forever could be. Tyson blinked hard for a moment just as their waitress returned to take their orders, looking expectantly at Luli first.

[Zhou Luli]

Since she had been given the okay, Luli ordered all of her favorite things. There were egg rolls and the wonton soup and dumplings and of course, rice and some orange chicken and a couple of other things. Oh! And she added an iced tea to the list. Once her order had been taken, she clapped her hands together and looked over them at Tyson.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you."

There were no words for how hungry she got after channeling somebody's spirit. Even now, her stomach was rumbling, as if impatient for all that food she saw.

Bohai looked distressed and he was trying to touch Tyson. Biting her lip and looking downward at the table, Luli traced shapes on the old tabletop. It wasn't as if she didn't feel bad for the people who came to her for help. When people died suddenly or with too many hopes still left, they were anchored to this world. It was a kind of torture. Instead of passing on, like they should have, they were stuck here in a world where few could see or interact with them.

And even worse, when they were attached to a person. Because... well, one day Tyson would die and then what would become of Bohai? Luli knew; he would rot. His spirit would twist into something terrible. Into what they called a demon, a spirit gone bad. We should help him move on, she almost said but when she looked back up, she had a feeling that it wasn't the right time to say so. Tyson was in a bad place, too. He needed to reach an understanding before he could fully appreciate what she meant. Right now, he was still too sad, too hurt. He needed Bohai around, even if he was just a spirit that he couldn't even see or hear.

"He only wants to be with you," she said, because it was the simple way of conveying the way the ghost was looking at his lover. "That's why he's still here."

[Tyson Liu]

"I'll have another glass of tea, please," Tyson said when it came time for him to order, feeling even less hungry than he did when he first met Luli. His appetite wasn't there. He'd been growing thinner and thinner since Bohai passed away and people had grown concerned about him, but Tyson simply lost interest in the world around him. He didn't care for or about food, drink or entertainment. Life was dull and empty for him without Bohai.

The waitress didn't seem that concerned about the imbalance of their orders but Tyson suspected she thought Luli had ordered for both of them. She certainly seemed to have ordered half the menu. Tyson didn't mind; he offered to pay and told her she could have anything she wanted. Money was not an issue, not even for a disproportionately large meal for one person.

"Yes." Tyson kept looking at the empty chair, at the space where Bohai was. His hand on the seat curled in as though he could hold Bohai's hand but all he got was a fistful of air. "I know that's why he's here." Bohai promised to never leave him. He was keeping that promise, that was all. Tyson's smile barely curved his lips as he leaned closer to the empty chair, gazing at the space where Bohai's face might have been.

"I won't make you wait long, Bo..."

[Zhou Luli]

"Wh-what? No!"

Luli actually shot out of her chair, standing up and staring at Tyson in horror. It didn't help that he only had half the story. But when Tyson said he wouldn't make him wait, Bohai looked at him with adoration and he-he-he wanted him to do it! Luli swept her hands in an X in front of her.

"No, no! Don't!"

A waitress came over, concerned. "Is everything all right?"

Blushing, Luli quickly dropped back into her seat. "Of course! Everything's fine. Fine."

When the waitress finally left, Luli breathed in, hand on her chest. Jeez, her heart was beating way too fast, scared, as if Tyson was about to drop dead right in front of her. Leaning forward, she lowered her voice in case people were listening. It certainly felt like there were a lot of eyes on her now.

"You can't do that. Killing yourself won't work! There's no guarantee you'll come back a ghost and even if you do, the longer a spirit stays tethered to this world, the more warped they become! Trust me, you don't want that, either of you!"

She looked over at Bohai with a severe expression too.

[Tyson Liu]

Realistically Tyson knew that Luli couldn't stay with them forever. Realistically he knew that she had her own life to live, and that it was cruel and wrong to keep her around solely for the purpose of channeling Bohai. And... she wasn't Bohai. Even if Bohai's spirit entered her, he was merely borrowing her body. Their time together would always be cut short; they could never return to the way they were.

This temporary balm on his broken heart was a welcomed relief but it wasn't a cure. The only cure was to join Bohai. To be with him in eternity, the way they were meant to be. Tyson knew Bohai agreed because if their positions were reversed, he would want the same. But he didn't expect Luli to have such a violent reaction to his words--words not even meant for her, but for Bohai sitting beside him. Tyson looked up at her in astonishment. He was about to pull her back down when the waitress came over, and Luli reassured her and sent her away.

He listened to her whispers but his mind was already made up. Tyson didn't say anything for a while. He looked at the empty seat, at the place where Bohai used to be. He tried to imagine himself in a year without Bohai and there was just... nothing. Nothing came up. Nothing.

"If I go, he'll go with me," he said to Luli at last. "There wouldn't be anyone tethering him to this world then."

[Zhou Luli]

They were both so, ugh! Why were men so dumb? They were going to screw up big time if they thought they would just be ghosts together. Plus, Luli didn't want the man to kill himself just to be with his lover! It must hurt, now, but if he only let time pass, it would hurt a little less with each day. He just... he just had to keep living. For himself! For Bohai!

Only, Bohai was all too happy to hear that his lover wanted to join him. Wisely, Luli didn't share this with Tyson. But Bohai was over the moon about it. His eyes shone with unshed tears and he reached for the arm that he couldn't touch, that his hand went right through, hand sliding to a hand he also couldn't touch.

She didn't know what to say in the face of that, though. If Tyson killed himself... If he killed himself to be with somebody who was already passed, who was tethered to the world in a different way... Sometimes when somebody killed themselves, they stayed behind because the world was cruel; most people who killed themselves couldn't stand this reality anymore and wanted to escape it. Tyson wouldn't want to be here; he just wanted to be with Bohai.

"You shouldn't be thinking about killing yourself. You should be..." She glanced at Bohai, who seemed not to like her much. "You should be thinking of how to help him move onto the next life so that when you do die, you'll be together. Because if you kill yourself and he's still here and you're not, he's going to be stuck here."

[Tyson Liu]

"...I see."

Tyson knew nothing about how the afterlife worked, or about ghosts and their reasons for lingering. He thought simply, perhaps naively, that Bohai was only here because he was here. And if he died then couldn't they both move on? Couldn't they be together in the next life? In the afterlife? But Luli was suggesting that he could go and Bohai could be stuck here, in which case what else could keep Bohai here?

He would have to ask Bohai in person when he next took over the girl's body. Arguing with her was pointless; Tyson didn't want to upset her further or drive her away. She might run off on him, afraid to let him come into contact with Bohai in case he tried to go through with his plans. So he smiled reassuringly at her and nodded slowly.

"All right. We'll help him move on first. You should eat, don't let your food go cold."

He turned to the chair again and smiled softly at the air. At Bohai. Tyson knew that Bohai would understand what he was doing by placating Luli. Bohai could practically read his mind the second day they got together--that was how strong their bond was. And Bohai would know that Tyson would do anything--anything--to be with him.