Tell me all the ways to love you

[Ryland Ren]

Rain slapped against the windows of the shelter's front office, coming down harder as the morning wore on. Ryland sat sideways in one of the uncomfortable chairs lined up along the wall, his leg dangling over the arm. In his hand was his phone. On his face was a half frown. Nervous didn't really cut how he felt. Butterflies were causing a riot in his stomach and he wriggled his dangling foot in a vain attempt to wear out some of the nerves.

How long had it been since he was face to face with Aldon? Almost a year? In all that time, Ryland didn't really date much. Most of his time was occupied trying to help out with the curse, the ancient thing, and his new line of work at the shelter. His mouth felt dry. Why did he agree to meet the other man, anyway? Why did he agree to meet Aldon?

He switched back over to Alva, figuring he needed time with Rae. Alva gave so much good advice but the things he said pricked Ryland straight to the heart. Now he couldn't help thinking what an asshat he had been, not to notice how much he scared Aldon into a corner. Hope sprung eternal when it came to Aldon--he couldn't help hoping that Alva was right about Aldon's fear and his real reason for "falling" for somebody else. It could just be that he clutched onto somebody for fear of being alone. Why, though?! He never did that before, and they broke up all the time!

What made this time so different?

"You're going to scoot that chair straight out the door," Kathy said dryly from her place behind the big round desk. She had been busy all morning on the phones, doing damage control over Rae's little tiff the night before.

"Sorry." Ryland stopped kicking his foot and turned to sit in it like a regular person. "I'm just waiting for somebody."

"Somebody else?" Kathy raised her brows.

"Yeah... a ride. To check on Rae." Which was sort of true. He wasn't getting into his love life (or lack thereof, actually) with Kathy. In response, Kathy pressed her lips together, then shook her head and went back to her work.

"You better be here all day tomorrow," she said as she sifted through some paperwork. "Or you're getting docked hours. I'm going to give them all to the new kid."

Ryland put up a hand. "I'll be here. Extra time. Over the weekend, even. Just give me today."

"Hm..." Kathy was about to say something more on the subject but looked up as the front office door opened. Ryland looked up, too, then felt his heart do a flip. He got to his feet, somehow.

"That's him. Gotta go. Bye, Kathy, see you tomorrow!" He grabbed onto Aldon's arm to direct him back outside, all the while reeling over how good he looked. How the hell did he manage to keep getting better looking? Or maybe it was that whole absence growing fonder business.

[Aldon Huang]

"HE SAID YES!" Aldon shrieked to his cab driver, who in the time between picking Aldon up and driving him to the shelter outside of town had learned everything that there was to learn about Aldon's relationship woes. What could he say? He was an open book. Maybe an audiobook. Maybe an audiobook with the volume controls broken, at the highest maximum setting.

Aldon, he liked to share. Everything. His joys, his fears, his thoughts, his feelings. Before, they used to be superficial feelings but now he felt as if he had changed and grown. Now he didn't balk at telling everyone how he really felt because if there was one thing that he learned from being with Ryland and then losing Ryland, it was that withholding his truest, most innermost thoughts led to misunderstandings.

Now the only misunderstandings came from his words.

Er. Or something like that.

Gleeful and overjoyed, he almost ran out of the cab before it came to a full stop, he was so eager to get inside and to see Ryland again. Imagine living in the same town and not being able to meet! Or even talk to him! Ryland even changed his number, which really hurt Aldon's feelings seeing as how Aldon was careful to keep his just in case Ryland called. Just in case he missed Aldon or wanted to hear his voice. Just in case he changed his mind.

Aldon's shoes splattered through puddles as he ran for the shelter and then burst on through. His chest was rising and falling rapidly; his eyes scanned the room for Ryland only for Ryland to walk right up to him and grab his arm and drag him outside. Aldon was tongue-tied. It was like meeting an idol that he'd idolized for his entire adult life, up close and personal. It... he... they just...

"RY!" They had just gotten outside, out in the rain, when Aldon threw his arms around Ryland and clutched at him for dear life. He was sure that his heart beat so hard, Ryland might feel it against his chest through their clothes.

[Ryland Ren]

Somehow, he knew that Aldon was going to explode and he was right in getting him out of the office before he did it in front of Kathy. His supervisor didn't necessarily like Ryland that much--she thought he was a slacker and he didn't work hard enough (and he hadn't really proven himself that capable in the time he worked there) but she didn't need another reason to stare at him with disapproval every time he came to work.

And he was right. The moment they were outside, with the rain still slopping down in great, fat drops, Aldon clung to him like cellophane. All right. Ryland had to admit at least this (to himself): he missed Aldon's hugs. And his enthusiasm. It was hard not to react when somebody was that happy to see him. Lifting a hand, he held onto Aldon's lower back, like he thought he needed to steady Aldon. Maybe he did. Aldon was prone to surprising him with all of his weight or swinging him around or even leaping on him.

"Okay, okay," he said, trying to calm Aldon down. He could feel the rain soaking through his clothes and plastering his hair to his head. Aldon would choose to do this in a downpour. "Come on, let's get in the car before we drown out here."

[Aldon Huang]

"No. Hug me back."

He was holding Ryland hostage until he got a proper hug. Ryland's hand was just touching his back but that was no hug! Aldon might not get another chance for a hug; he might blow this whole thing by being... himself and if this was going to be a rare opportunity, he wanted to take advantage of it. But he did hug Ryland less tightly afterwards, aware that he didn't always have the best control over his own strength. Werewolf muscles and all. Feral genes and all.

The rain didn't bother him though. He liked it; it felt nice and clean slicking down his hair, against his skin. Aldon might regret heavy soaked clothes later when they were sitting in the cab, but he wasn't the forward-looking type. Not the practical one.

[Ryland Ren]

"Oh my god..." Ryland muttered under his breath. Wasn't he already hugging him? He had an arm around him, didn't he? The contrary, foxy side of Ryland wanted to point this out, to play games--I'm already hugging you~ He knew that wasn't going to cut it with Aldon. He could hound Ryland like no other. With a long suffering sigh, he brought his other arm around Aldon's shoulder.

They really were close. Their chests pressed against one another, Ryland could have sworn he could feel a heart that beat in time with his. This close up, their noses were practically touching. Ryland wrinkled his nose playfully but he didn't stop the forward momentum that led him to brushing noses, just the way they used to when they were dating. With the wind picking up, it took his breath away or maybe it was just being so close to Aldon that he could see the dark flecks in his brown eyes.

Are you happy now? he wanted to ask but he didn't. The smile on Aldon's lips reached his eyes. There was a definite fondness in his gaze that only Aldon managed to get right. It wasn't the wind taking his breath away. Ryland's hand moved from Aldon's shoulder. He intended to step back, make some remark. The aforementioned happy one. But his hand stopped at Aldon's chest, fingertips twisting in the wet fabric of Aldon's shirt. He didn't move away.

His head tilted--just so--and his lips were on Aldon's. A soft kiss at first, lips on lips. Warm. Heat shivered from head to toe. His fingers bunched at the small of Aldon's back as he deepened the kiss, as naturally as if they were two lovers meeting for a date and not estranged exes meeting for the first time in months.

[Aldon Huang]

"I deserve a hug," Aldon whispered coaxingly, although the wind whipped around him so hard that he was sure half the syllables were swept away. It was hard to breathe. He took in big gulps of air but only the tiniest fraction of oxygen went into his lungs because when he was this close to Ryland, he forgot everything except Ryland. Aldon could stop eating, stop drinking, stop breathing and stop speaking but he couldn't stop being in love with Ryland.

Too bad it took him so long to realize it, and then even longer to say the words. Too bad their relationship had gone through so many ups and downs, derailed time and again, before Aldon came to understand himself and his own feelings. The depth of them scared him. He fooled around as most normal guys his age did before he met Ryland and then it was like falling off the side of a sheer cliff. Everything fell away abruptly; Ryland was all he could think about, all he dreamt about.

They got so serious so quickly that Aldon didn't have time to grow into the relationship and with Ryland. He sort of threw himself headlong into it, as he did with most things, never imagining that his life would take on so many twists and turns. Aldon wasn't a complicated guy. If he was hungry, he ate. If he was sleepy, he curled up and slept. If he was amorous, he... asked for a belly rub. But asking him to articulate so many complex, intertwined feelings? He grew overwhelmed and flustered and eventually even scared.

It was strange to think that Ryland scared him, but he did. Everything that used to go right went horribly wrong. Aldon was sure that he played a part in all of that but for the life of him, he couldn't figure out where he went wrong and Ryland wouldn't tell him, either. He bumbled his way through everything, ham-fistedly throwing his feelings around hoping to fit the square peg into any sort of a hole. But relationships didn't work like that. Ryland didn't work like that.

Aldon spent the better part of a year, in the time that they were apart, trying to figure out just where he went wrong. Life did go on, despite his initials feelings otherwise. He crafted a new relationship with Gregg and forged a new life with him. Things were going well, as much as could be expected. But he couldn't forget Ryland. He couldn't not feel a surge of anxiety and anticipation every time his phone buzzed, hoping that it might be Ryland. Aldon loved deeply and he loved forever. For keeps.

Ryland did too. Except his love had one focus—Aldon. So what changed? What made him reconsider meeting Gregg? His cryptic response of 'a little fox' didn't make much sense to Aldon but the way he looked at Aldon in that moment. Well, that made all the sense in the world. That was a familiar look, a timeless scenario that had played out over and over again, each time they broke up and then made up. That was a look which said that his feelings were no less intense than Aldon's.

They were hugging now. Their arms were around one another and as hard as the wind tried to push them apart, they remained glued together. Aldon's smile didn't waver or falter. He had eyes only for Ryland, magical clever baffling inexplicable Ryland whose nose brushed his and sent a pang of remembrance through him. Ryland who took his breath away and also filled him with the most indescribable joy, so much that he buoyed Aldon and sent him flying alllll the way up into the skies. Ryland who... was touching him, twisting his fingers in Aldon's shirt, coming closer and closer and startled Aldon stood there like a dummy watching him as though in a trance.

"Ah—" he gasped shortly before their lips met. It wasn't even until after they kissed that he realized Ryland had leaned in to kiss him. He never dared to dream that Ryland would kiss him after all the things that had happened, and after Aldon made him so angry and frustrated that he dropped all contact for a whole year. Imagine being so angry, for so long. Aldon screwed up big time...

This was his chance to make things right, though. This was the opportunity—the hug he forced out of Ryland, in a manner of speaking. If it was to be the last chance then he had to seize it and never let go. He clung even more tightly to Ryland as the kiss deepened and as his lips parted to deepen it. Aldon was sure that this was a dream. If he opened his eyes Ryland would disappear, so he kept his eyes tightly closed and he poured all of his feelings into the kiss. He kissed as if it was the first and the last, as if he could somehow communicate all of his muddled-up feelings without uttering a single word.

[Ryland Ren]

Yeah... Yeah, maybe he did deserve a hug. Ryland did put him through a lot of hell, even if he wasn't the only one who played with heartstrings. Aldon was always disappearing on him and then showing back up like nothing was wrong. Every time they separated and met again, Aldon acted like nothing happened. At least, he used to. Lately... the ups and downs of their relationship had been taking its toll on him, especially if what Alva said about him was true.

Ryland's heart ached for him when he read those words. Was he really playing with Aldon's heart all along? When he thought he was the one being played? For the longest time, he couldn't understand Aldon's reluctance to just say those three little words. Eight little letters. I love you. How hard could it be, if Aldon really loved him? Ryland had no idea that it was his trump card, that he was holding it close to his chest because he thought it was the only thing Ryland needed of him before he left for good.

That revelation was a heart breaking one. Ryland never meant it to get this far out of hand. Truly, he thought it was as easy as getting back together one last time. Except every "last" time turned into a new breakup, over such stupid things. Ryland reflected on those things when he couldn't sleep at night, staring at the slowly spinning ceiling fan, recalling nights in which his legs were entangled with Aldon's, where his head rested against his warm, naked chest, hand resting on his stomach because Aldon loved his belly rubs.

They used to talk about all kinds of things. Nonsense things like movies they just saw, favorite songs, the lady that gave them an evil look at the supermarket, the balloon that got caught in the tree, names for hypothetical pets... Sometimes, they talked about serious things. What happened to Alva? Ryland hated telling that story. Rarely did. But he told Aldon.

And there were games. Actual fun games, not stupid mind games. The kind of games where Aldon went to brush his teeth and came out to find Ryland missing, only for him to grasp onto Aldon's ankle from under the bed, scaring the bejeezus out of him. Or pouncing on him from under the blankets to pull him in closer with promises of things to come.

Ryland dated around, before he met Aldon and between their relationship's rocky ups and downs, when it seemed like they were never, ever getting back together. But then they would. And then they weren't. Ryland was a bit demanding--he did expect Aldon to drop his new man for him and when he didn't, when he confessed he loved him, it blew Ryland apart. It ripped apart every memory they had until he was looking at scattered remnants, shaded blue with melancholy. It hurt so much to look at them that he pushed them into a closet and erased Aldon. His number. Moved into a new apartment. Got a new job. New everything.

But the truth was, Aldon occupied his whole heart. Ryland could date others and fool himself into thinking it was love but it was fool's gold. It wasn't real. He was looking into the eyes of people that he could interchange with somebody else and break up with and move on. Aldon, though, he was always there in his periphery. Always.

Always.

Aldon deserved a hug. He got a kiss. He got a real kiss, one that burst with unrepressed affection. The kiss deepened and it lingered long after the rest of the breath was robbed from their lungs. Eyes closed, nose to nose, he breathed Aldon in, the scent of his skin, the cold wet spray of the wind juxtaposed against the warmth of his breath, the proximity of their bodies embraced. When he opened his eyes, Aldon's eyes were still closed. Ryland kissed the tip of his nose, hands moving to cup Aldon's face.

This wasn't how he planned to greet Aldon. In fact, he was planning to just get in the car and make stiff conversation on the way to pick up Rae. He expected to feel tense as he waited to meet Mr. Right. But he completely forgot about him when his eyes met Aldon's as he oh-so-reluctantly gave in to his demand for a hug.

"I miss you."

[Aldon Huang]

Aldon just wanted a hug. A nice big hug to let him know that Ryland wasn't mad at him anymore, and had forgiven Aldon for hurting him. Maybe even semi-forgave Aldon, he thought he could take that and make something of it. Aldon was the type to be given an inch and take a mile, except this time he was given the mile up front. A kiss was more than he hoped for.

But he got it; he savored it. He treasured it and hoarded the memory of the moment, like a long-overdue homecoming. There was never any doubt that he and Ryland were that sickening couple who couldn't get enough of each other. Ryland thought that the honeymoon phase was over but Aldon would have begged to differ. The honeymoon phase wasn't over. How could it be when he only felt stronger and stronger towards Ryland? He didn't think he could ever see Ryland and not want a hug, a kiss, a cuddle or a belly rub. He could never disassociate Ryland's name with love and affection.

"Heh... me-me too."

Aldon sniffled. It was cold. The rain was lashing down on them and they were soaked. His nose was tickly from cold, not from Ryland admitting that he missed him. He wasn't emotional. Rae would've kicked him in the butt for being emotional but it was okay to be cold and sniffly in the rain. Yeah... Even Rae got cold sometimes—just never in front of Aldon, but Aldon heard things from Alva and from Ryland. Even tough guys got cold and sniffly sometimes, so it was okay.

"Ry, I—"

BEEP BEEP!

The cab driver honked the horn so suddenly that Aldon jumped a little. "OH!" He exclaimed, remembering that the driver was still waiting for them and probably didn't want to watch them kissing in the rain. They could kiss inside the cab, where it was dry and warm. Aldon stepped away but took Ryland's hand and ran with him to the cab. He flung open the door to the back and bundled them both inside, then shut the door with a loud slam.

"Hospital please!" Aldon told the driver as he snuggled up against Ryland wetly. Yech. They squelched and he felt unpleasant all over. The invigorating rain was only invigorating when it wasn't sitting on his body in soaked clothing. Aldon shifted uncomfortably and gave Ryland an aggrieved look. "I feel gross!"

[Ryland Ren]

Ryland waited, gaze locked on Aldon. Then the annoyingly high pitched honk rent the air and jolted Ryland's nerves. He turned a glare on the car in question, not caring if it was their ride or not. Couldn't the driver see they were having a moment here? Not to mention that honk completely erased whatever Aldon was about to say. He what? He loved him? His heart pounded hard. Of course he did. It wasn't that he missed him because he already agreed with his "me too." So what was it? God, he hoped it wasn't an apology. He was past those. All he wanted was Aldon back, other guy be damned.

"Ah!"

Ryland was tugged along with Aldon as he made a mad dash for the car, the rain and wind crashing all around them. How had not noticed that before? It was turning into a full-on storm! Blinking back the raindrops dappling his face, he got into the car and huddled in the backseat, glad for the warmth of the car but... Yeah. The wet clothes were a huge turn-off. Ryland stared right back at Aldon and for a moment, the severity of his expression probably made it look as if he was about to say I told you so, moron. Instead, his expression changed and he quickly dipped his head low to hide the fact that he was laughing silently.

[Aldon Huang]

Did... Was Ryland angry? At Aldon? For the rain? Well, for making them stand in the rain but Aldon's hug would have lasted ten seconds! The kiss lasted... a bit longer than that. He couldn't help but feel warm all over—damp, but warm—as he recalled their most recent Moment. Capital M and everything. It was a definite Moment, a romantic and sweet reunion if not for the skies opening up and rain being dumped on them.

Well, one couldn't have everything, Aldon supposed.

He was about to apologize when Ryland ducked his head, confusing Aldon who thought that he was going to sneeze. Aldon sat perfectly still. Movement would chase the sneeze away and there was nothing funny about wanting desperately to sneeze and then... not being able to. It was the worst feeling in the world! Then Ryland's shoulders began to shake and, aghast, Aldon was convinced that he was crying.

"R-Ry? Ry?!" He reached out to grab Ryland by the arm, to make him look up. Was he happy-crying? Or sad-crying? Aldon couldn't tell and it distressed him to think that such a happy moment was turning into such a sad one. "Are you okay?!"

[Ryland Ren]

It was the look on Aldon's face that started it. Ryland took one look at it and he couldn't contain the laughter so he had to hide it. For some reason. He didn't even know why he was hiding it. Aldon just looked so serious and it didn't help that when he ducked his head to hide the mirth that Aldon took that seriously, too. Poor Aldon; he was just concerned and all he did was push Ryland into laughing harder, shoulders shaking harder until he couldn't contain it any longer.

A burst of laughter escaped and he looked up as Aldon grabbed his arm, looking and sounding so concerned. Poor thing had to be confused. He seemed so worried and here Ryland was, laughing. He turned into Aldon and let out another laugh, reaching up to pat him on the chest as if that would make up for the laughter. It wasn't as if Ryland laughed in his face to make fun of him. He just couldn't help it. Everything was so tense and then... it wasn't.

"I'm... fine!" Ryland gasped, giving Aldon another pat on the chest before attempting to straighten himself out. "You just looked so...!" He burst into laughter again. How did he explain it? It was impossible. Aldon just... he looked so hilarious. Ryland slid an arm around Aldon's wet shoulders, ignoring the gross squelching between them.

"I swear, I'm not laughing at you. You just--you keep taking things too seriously!"

Which was a fine thing for Ryland to say. Hush. He had enough with the SRS BSNS. With all the tension leading up to this moment, it was possible he was just a little hysterical. But really, he thought it was relief. Aldon was the same Aldon; he hadn't changed or morphed into somebody else in his absence. Whatever his new guy was to him, he hadn't warped his Aldon into something unrecognizable.

[Aldon Huang]

Oh no! Oh no oh no! Ryland was crying and Aldon was at his wits' end because--once again--he had absolutely no idea what was wrong or what he did to make it that way. A hysterical laugh could sound like a sob; a shaking back and tremors could seem like grief.

Gripped by panic, Aldon started  to get emotional himself when Ryland finally burst out with a "HAHA" and it became quite obvious that he was laughing and not crying. At first, Aldon was stunned. He still sorta didn't know what was going on; he was clueless. Then he was relieved that Ryland wasn't crying but... but being laughed at wasn't pleasant either!

Eventually he became indignant, despite Ryland's hand against his chest and arm around him. Aldon crossed his arms and frowned, turned the corners of his lips way down. "It's--not funny! That's what you always wanted me to do! Take everything seriously!"

How many times did Aldon get in trouble for trying to lighten the mood? How many times did he get put in the dog house for failing to live up to Ryland's expectations of how seriously he should have been taking their relationship? And now he was being laughed at for being TOO serious!

"It's not funny," he grumbled, genuinely hurt. Still baffled, too, as to what set Ryland off and why now he didn't want Aldon to be serious. It was like Aldon couldn't do anything right!!

"You're mean!"

[Ryland Ren]

"Am not!" Ryland protested. MEAN? Ryland? Since when?! It was just that look on Aldon's face and the fact that they were soaking wet and the gross sounds every time they moved and the way the driver kept looking at them, like he was about to charge them triple for soaking up his car... Haha...

"You don't think this is funny?" he asked, tugging on his own wet clothes. Even though he'd worn a jacket to work, it was useless against a storm. Denim jackets were all well and good... but they weren't when it came to repelling water. It was the kind of jacket one wore for style more than warmth. And hey, he saw it was grey out when he woke up but he had no idea it was going to evolve into a full blown storm!

Ryland looked over at Aldon and his down-turned lips and he turned his own downward to match him. Aldon was taking things awfully serious. What did Alva say? Listen to him? Pay attention. Something like that. Not that Ryland was bad at that in the past but... maybe he wasn't as good at it as he imagined he was. After a moment, Ryland slowly withdrew, crossing his arms, frown still present on his face. Well now nothing seemed amusing. He shrugged slightly.

"I just thought you looked like a soaked puppy. It was funny."

Jacket

[Aldon Huang]

( You're a corporate shill, hawking Mark's clothing line! LOL <3 )

Well. Ryland WAS mean to keep on laughing without letting Aldon know what was so funny. Aldon didn't think the wet clothes were funny when they were plastered to him and he didn't think(?) that there was anything hilarious about anything that had happened. It had been a lonesome, tiring, heart-breakingly long time since they'd last talked—not even met, but spoken—and there was nothing humorous about having one's heart broken.

He didn't begrudge Ryland the laughter... eventually. But by then Ryland was frowning and Ryland was crossing his arms and Ryland's lips were turned down at the corners. After a moment, Aldon looked down at himself and at his rain-soaked sweatshirt. Well he wouldn't have said that it was funny still, but he also didn't want to start arguing again or fighting. They started off so well and now things were rapidly escalating out of control.

"...sorry," he said softly, unsure of how to make things right so that they could go back to passionately embracing instead of... sitting with their arms crossed and frowning at each other. It was just strange to be in the dog house one moment and then suddenly have Ryland laughing at him. And it wasn't even that he hated the sound of Ryland's laugh or anything (because he didn't!) but it was confusing to Aldon's poor, simple brain.

He still didn't know where Ryland stood on everything! What he thought about the arrangement with Gregg, what made him suddenly decide to meet Gregg when he declared hotly to Aldon's face that he could never bear to even consider a meeting. Aldon was so nervous about all of that. What if things didn't work out? What if Ryland left for good? He thought Ryland left for good last time and that had such an impact on him—such a devastating, negative impact. It broke Aldon down into tiny pieces.

Suddenly meeting like this and having that immediate, visceral reaction to Ryland left him overwhelmed, too. It was a lot to process and a lot of information to take in and added to that a slow-turning mind, well... It just took Aldon a while to adjust to things, that was all. And this was possibly the biggest turning point in his love life.

"...are you mad?" Aldon leaned closer and gently nudged Ryland's arm with his own, which he had unfolded. "You're not mad, right?"

[Ryland Ren]

(LOL REPRESENT)

Before this meeting, all Ryland saw was Disaster. All he saw was Heartbreak. He was certain that he couldn't handle looking at Aldon ever again, hence cutting him out of his life entirely. That was a difficult decision to make but the idea of seeing Aldon with somebody else made his stomach churn and his heart ache. Why put himself through that? And that was when he decided they couldn't even be friends. They were nothing to each other. That was how it had to be, if he was to stay sane.

Without Aldon, life did eventually move forward. The world didn't stop spinning just because of a shitty breakup. Ryland had his moments. He went out, got drunk, did some stupid things. Flings, that kind of thing. He cried, but only in private and then washed away his shame and went about his life.

Eventually, things started to become a new kind of normal. It wasn't like Ryland didn't have turns in his life without Aldon, so this was just another one--one that would never end. It was daunting to think about... so he didn't. He focused on other things. Dating fell behind as an idea; his heart still hurt and if it wasn't a fling, he really didn't want it. The idea of letting anybody else in close wasn't appealing. Ryland was so tired of breaking hearts and having his own still on the mend, it made sense. Don't let anybody new in. And he'd been pretty good at that.

There was more to life than having a constant partner and lover. Besides, there was the Alva drama to deal with, which was serious business and needed a lot of attention. There were a lot of scary changes happening in the underground super world, things he wasn't equipped to help with but he was trying. He was doing his best to help Alva and Susumu and the others (even if he and Yoojin still had their reservations about Susumu, he seemed to make Alva happy.)

So when he contacted Aldon, it was an excuse to talk to him. See how he was. Ryland didn't want it to go any deeper than the situation with Rae. But he did. Deep down--and Alva totally called him out on it. So here he was, in a car with Aldon and it was just... it was so absurd. Ryland dreamed about seeing him again and the dreams were fantasy--too good to be true. And when he thought about it during his waking hours, he really saw Disaster. He couldn't help it. He was jealous. He wasn't happy. So in meeting Aldon again, he was sure it would be very reserved and polite, that he would maintain his distance and... instead he blew it all by kissing Aldon the second they had any physical contact.

That was... kinda funny, wasn't it? Or maybe Ryland was crazy. It was just that he had this anticipation built up in his head that everything would go wrong and then it didn't. Except now it was. Because they were sitting there like pissy elementary school kids, unable to deal with their emotions properly. Ryland glanced over at Aldon as he was nudged, then looked away, still feeling very much like the pissy elementary school kid.

"I'm..." Not, he was going to say but he was. He was and he didn't even really know why. Why was he mad? Why did Aldon always do this to him? Everything seemed to be going great and then something Aldon did ended up hitting a sour note with Ryland and they ended up in a fight that Aldon didn't ever understand and to be honest, even Ryland didn't understand it. Why did they always end up fighting? Over stupid things?!

His phone buzzed and he took the opportunity to check it. Alva. Alva, saying don't rush, even though they were already in the cab and on the way. Ryland sighed and set the phone down on his lap.

"Alva says Rae's asleep so we don't have to rush." But then what were they supposed to do? Ride the cab around town until Rae woke up? He fidgeted with his phone, just to have something to do with himself.

"Maybe I should just go back to work..." Maybe this was a terrible idea.