I caught it bad yesterday

Started by Brendan Vincent at Aug 07, 2021 3:35 PM
April 2, 2051
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76 Posts

We're catching lightning in a bottle

24Age
6'1Height
59 Posts

All the appetite left Brendan for the moment while he nervously fiddled with the edge of the cushion he sat on, wondering if Sev was going to regret getting tangled up with him. Brendan wasn't going to be affectionate like this when they left. He wasn't going to be the kind of person Sev loved being around and he was afraid that sooner or later, Sev was going to turn to someone else for all the things that Brendan lacked.

He swallowed, trying to press down that big ball of anxiety in the back of his throat. If only he could be normal. If only he could be like all the other guys he saw with their girls (or guys), freely expressing their love. Fingertips under his chin made him look up, but he still resisted slightly for fear of what Sev had to say. 

What Sev had to say was brief, but it made him pause. That was true--they were alone right now. And Brendan had gotten comfortable with him, enough to initiate hand-holding and engage in kisses. Was that enough for Sev? He didn't know if even Sev could say, or vouch for his future self. 

Slowly he nodded to indicate that he understood. Maybe Sev wanted them to live more in the moment. With danger surrounding them, worrying about the past or the future was pretty much pointless. Plus, they'd agreed to start over, didn't they? Brendan nodded again, then leaned closer to kiss him on the cheek. He could at least try--for Sev. Then he smiled, sheepish and embarrassed, and brought up some spaghetti from his can to Sev's lips to feed him in that cutesy way that Brendan had always seen on TV, but had never had anyone to try it on. 


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21Age
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60 Posts

To Sev, it didn't much matter--at least right now--if Brendan couldn't be affectionate around other people. Sure, Sev was the kind of person who totally wanted to show off his love for somebody. He wanted the whole world to know he was stupid, goofy, happy-in-love. But he got it. Brendan wasn't really the flamboyant type. Actually, he was private. Super private. Super reserved. Quiet, and not just because of his inability to hear. It just seemed to be in his nature. Maybe because of the disability, maybe not, but it was inherently part of him.

It was hardly a dealbreaker for Sev, as much as Brendan seemed to think it was. Could it be that Sev hadn't communicated effectively, either? Heh. Probably not... Sev just sort of leapt into things and took it for granted that the other person just knew instinctively what he meant. Like they could read his mind right before he spoke, on a totally different track than the previous spoken words. That was part of Sev's problem, too. He wasn't the best communicator, either. Just because he was an extroverted talker didn't mean he was good at getting his own feelings across properly.

Sev half smiled as Brendan attempted to feed him romantically. Look at him try! It was so endearing. So... cute. It flushed his heart with warmth and his half smile grew and he happily took the bite he was offered. Was he supposed to do so back? He offered a bite to Brendan.

"Just so you know, I don't care if you're not public about... this kind of thing," he said. "In a way, it's kind of our secret."

Not that their relationship was. Just... the nature of it didn't have to be anybody else's business.


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We're catching lightning in a bottle

24Age
6'1Height
59 Posts

Maybe spaghetti wasn't the easiest thing to feed someone but boy, did Brendan try his best. In retrospect, maybe fondue would've been more romantic, but supplies were limited out here so canned spaghetti had to do. He tried not to smile when Sev gamely (and dutifully) ate the bite of food, only to in turn offer him a bite too. Brendan dipped his head forward just as Sev began to speak and ended up with his mouth latched around the fork, watching his lips move with rapt attention. 

He started to nod around the fork and then realized how stupid he looked. Brendan took the food off the fork and swallowed and thought about this being their secret. This relationship? Or this kind of nausea-inducing feeding each other picnics on top of water towers thing? Probably the latter. Sev didn't seem like the type of person who could keep a relationship secret, as much as he did try not to discomfort Brendan with overtures of affection in public. 

Our secret. Brendan liked that. It put less pressure on him to perform in front of others and also, he could store up all of his affection for when they were alone. At least, it was a workable compromise and maybe... maybe Brendan would surprise him occasionally. Hold his hand in public or something. Not give him Looks when he sat too close and their knees bumped together.

He grabbed his can of spaghetti--now over the feeding thing, since it was making his skin melt from the cuteness--and leaned into Sev, slowly eating while watching the sun set. It was nice. Sev was a comforting presence beside him and he felt warmed by both Sev's acceptance and by the food settling into his stomach after an adventure-filled day. Brendan couldn't remember feeling this way since the start of this nightmare, honestly, and he would never in a million years have believed that it was all thanks to Sev. 

Briefly he side-eyed Sev and then gave him a little nuzzle on the cheek. Thanks.


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21Age
6'2"Height
60 Posts

Back to eating their meals like normal people, Sev let out a soft laugh and then grinned into his next solo bite. The feeding each other thing was cute--adorable, even--but he understood why Brendan stopped. It was cute but impractical and they couldn't afford to waste any food. Still, he felt beyond cloud nine because Brendan had shown him secret hideout, invited him in, and even showed affection. The idea that Brendan should have to show this side of himself around other people to validate Sev's feelings? Moot. Sev didn't care what other people thought.

Would it be too much if he showed affection, though? In public? Maybe. He might have to learn how to curb that part of his nature, but it was okay. People who cared about somebody could make little compromises like that.

He felt like he was glowing as he polished off his food and set it aside. Brendan was still feeling quite affectionate, it seemed, and Sev for one, was milking it for all it was worth while he could. His smile was wide and genuine as he nuzzled Brendan in response. When he turned his face toward him, he gently left a kiss on Brendan's cheek and leaned against him. Not all his weight. Just a little bit, so that they were body to body. Warmth against warmth.

"For what?" he asked, tilting his head so that Brendan could read his lips, amused and bemused at once. Why was Brendan thanking him?


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We're catching lightning in a bottle

24Age
6'1Height
59 Posts

Brendan looked up when he caught sight of Sev's lips moving and shrugged. Thanks for... everything. There was a lot that he wanted to thank Sev for that he didn't have the words for right now. Much of it had to do with the way that Sev made him feel, both before and right now and in the intervening moments, that he had yet to parse through.

Having a difficult time expressing himself in so many words (or gestures, as it were), and being a slow thinker, Brendan sighed. I'll write you a letter, he signed eventually and with a little smile. Sev was the one who started the letter-writing trend, after all, so he couldn't complain about it, right? More importantly, it gave Brendan time to arrange his thoughts.

As the smile grew wider--and the idea took root--Brendan eased away. Let's go back inside. It's getting dark. Better not be caught out here, in case any raiders rolled through the area. He began to pack up the uneaten food to save for later and then stood up, extending a hand to Sev to help him to his feet.

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21Age
6'2"Height
60 Posts

"Okay!" Sev grinned. He looked forward to receiving a letter from Brendan, especially after he had left him so many letters himself. It also meant that Brendan had seen them. Read them. Sev wondered sometimes, but it would have been impossible for him not to have seen them. They were written inside of his sketchpad, after all. Sev felt slightly guilty about that, about taking up some of his precious paper with his letters but... He also didn't regret letting Brendan know how he felt through his letters. Sometimes it was just easier to compose his thoughts over paper, writing each word, picking each one with meticulous care.

"Okay," he said again, this time because he wanted to go back inside with Brendan. Taking Brendan's hand, he let him help him to his feet and went inside with him, heart full of affection and head full of hope. Maybe the future wouldn't be as grim as it seemed, as long as they had each other.


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