Who

Took

My

Apples?! 

@open

Apples!? What the fuck?

Who the HELL is this?


@Aliard Gaufrett

This is the person who will stop at nothing to track you down and destroy you

If you are the apple thief

Listen here you little fucker!

I didn't take any god damn apples, but if you wanna throw down I'll be more than happy to beat your ass!

You sound suspiciously defensive

APPLE THIEF

Suspiciously defensive!? APPLE THIEF!?!?!?

That's it!! You're FUCKING DEAD!

Where the hell are you? You won't have to worry about those damn apples cuz I'm gonna fly by and give you a four-coarse ass whooping for absolutely free!!

How does that sound?

SO

You are challenging me
The great Aliard Gaufrett
To a duel?

Although you sound rather crass to be a proper gentleman so perhaps you don't know how to duel

A Duel? Don't make me laugh! This is gonna be more like a beat down you little shit. "The great Aliard Gaufrett" my ass. You are nothing!

Don't get sassy with me. I'll fuck your shit up!!

You're gonna regret messaging me.

Bitch.

Have you considered getting counseling for this anger management issue you seem to have, madam?

I don't need counseling, you're just fucking infuriating!

Let's settle this face to face, man to man, and I'll show you a FUCKING MADAM!!

Oh I could never brutally attack a woman
No matter how lowly her station in life

After all, I am a gentleman. Aliard Gaufrett is no savage!

What!? WHAT!???

 I. AM. NOT. A. DAMN. WOMAN!!

Get out of here with that gentleman bullshit. I don't wanna hear it!

When I get my hands on you fuck boy you're gonna be sorry.

I'm sorry but I cannot duel a woman.
If you desire satisfaction for... whatever perceived slight you believe you've received

Perhaps you can ask the assistance of a man to duel on your behalf? I believe this would be a satisfactory arrangement for both parties.

I am about to arrange to have this boot up your ass!

I am a man!!

FIGHT ME YOU COWARD!!!!

Hmm... if you say so, but you don’t sound like a man...